…was blind but now I see

Last night I went to see The Passion of The Christ. It’s so hard to offer words to explain something that has irreversibly altered my very soul. It’s almost as if using them I’ll somehow cheapen what I’ve experienced because truly words can do no justice. This movie is something that millions of people are going to not just see but experience. And somehow, underneath all that there’s a level of intimacy that I experienced that I’ve never had before. I could’ve been the only one in that entire theatre and it wouldn’t have felt any different than it did surrounded by hundreds of others. I could spend the rest of this lifetime and all of eternity doing all I could to repay Him, but it could never even come close to being enough. It’s why He came, it’s why He suffered. It’s why He died. For me.

I was broken at the first glimpse of what it must’ve been like for Him in the Garden of Gethsemane bent over, under the weight of the sins of the world. My sins. It was excruciating, and somehow at the same time absolutely beautiful because I knew the ending. I had become so calloused to the actual gift that He gave me that I think along the way I’d become “used” to Him. He changed me through this movie. I pray I never stop being broken. I pray I never forget to be thankful. I pray that every day I only love Him more. I’ve never looked forward to being with Him for all of eternity more than I do now.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound
Amazing love, now flowing down
From hands and feet
That were nailed to the tree
His grace flows down and covers me
~Christy Nockels