Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Where do you go with your broken heart in tow?
What do you do with the left over you?
And how do you know, when to let go?
Where does the good go?
Where does the good go?

I’ve had so many conversations in the last few weeks about relationships. I don’t know exactly what God is trying to teach me but several of the people I’m closest to in my life are going through divorces and its left me really thinking about what I want in life. Sometimes I wish that I could change just what I’m drawn to. Is that normal? I mean, obviously I’m drawn to this type of person for a reason, but sometimes I don’t know that it’s the best choice for me. My mom and I talked about it for a long time. In light of some recent issues with my Dad, I’m wishing that I could understand him a little more. And at the same time I’m recognizing traits in me that either come from him, or as a result of him. And I’m not sure the best way to deal with those. Is it better to know exactly what I’m drawn to or just to let it be? And what happens when I’m drawn to someone that I never expected myself to be drawn to? Is that God or just me lonely? I don’t see myself as someone who’s fickle so I just think there has to be something behind it. Maybe it’s to teach me something, but how many object lessons is one person supposed to endure in their lifetime? I don’t know. Maybe I want too much. I want someone who will take risks for me. I want someone who wants to pursue me. I want someone who is drawn to who I am. I want someone who makes me more me. I want someone who accepts that I’ve got issues, and wants to love me through those. I want someone who’s not afraid to disagree with me. I want someone who’ll stand up to me. I want someone who’ll hold me when I’ve had a bad day. I want someone to think I’m the absolute perfect person for them. I want someone who makes me think more. I want someone who makes me more passionate. But more than anything else what I want is someone who’ll fight for me. Someone who thinks I’m worth working through all the issues we’re going to face together. I don’t think that’s too much to ask. And I’ll wait for it. As long as I have to.

Look me in the eye and tell me you don't find me attractive
Look me in the heart and tell me you won't go
Look me in the eye and promise your love's like our love
Look me in the heart and un break broken, it won't happen

It's love that leaves that breaks the seal of always thinking you would be
Real happy and healthy, strong and calm
Where does the good go?
Where does the good go?
-teagan and sara


Blogger Sarah said...

Liz, you know I'm not a dreamer, but I swear it's possible to find all that. It just may not be with the person you expect at all. I don't think anyone would have thought Kevin and I were a likely pair, and our relationship involved some leaps of faith. But my gut just told me to go for it. Some of those things you have in the beginning, and some take time to develop. You're one of the most amazing people I know, and you'll find someone who makes your heart sing when you least expect it. Hang in there, and don't let life/love get ya down!

12:44 PM  

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